Zachary's birth story

As a full-term pregnant student in midwifery school, I started thinking as Zachary's due date drew closer about the mind/body connection during labor and birth. I thought about how, in Ina May Gaskins Guide to Childbirth, she teaches about how fears can really hinder a mother from going into labor or if a mother is in labor fears have the potential to slow down or even stop the labor. So, I reflected. I went a good 8 days overdue with both Kyla and Avery, and even though being overdue can be perfectly normal, if there was anything I could do to change that possibility this time, I wanted to know because I was getting very uncomfortable! Two nights before Zachary was to be born, Pete and I were sitting on the couch and talking about what it was going to be like to have another baby. I told him that I realized deep down I was scared to have another baby. Not scared to give birth, but scared to have a newborn in the house again. For those of you that do not know, Avery was a very high-needs baby and also colicky. Pete and I really feel that part of the reason Avery was given to us was to keep us humble! From the moment she was born she cried. Little could soothe Avery from day one. Nursing, being held, rocking, bouncing...not much could keep Avery from crying and she slept very very little. The first time Avery gave us more than a 3 hour stretch of sleep was when she was 1 year old. When she was 8 months, we discovered her multiple food allergies. When she was 2 years old we discovered even more food allergies. Between the ages of 1 and 3 Avery had severe eczema that would make her cry and scratch and bleed and interrupt her sleep even more. If you've read this blog, you've read our stories. And now, we were getting ready to enter into an unknown...what would Zachary be like?

Pete reassured me that night as I told him my fears. "Sarah," he said, "remember the meaning of Zachary's name: 'the Lord has remembered'. God knows what we went through with Avery. Zachary will be different than Avery." I was immediately at peace with having another baby and for the first time really looking forward to meeting this little guy and getting to know him.

On Friday, June 11th, my mom came up to take me out to lunch and go shopping for clothes for the girls. It was just the two of us...which was kind of a rare thing, being able to hang out with just my mom. We had so much fun and I really treasured our time together. We had lunch at Panera Bread and then went to Target where I walked up and down those aisles for 2.5 hours. I was so distracted by all the pretty clothes my mom was picking out to buy for the girls. The more I walked, the "stronger" my Braxton-hicks contractions became. But I decided in my head that I would not pay any attention to them, I was remembering what I taught in my classes: it's best to ignore labor until you can't ignore it anymore.

Later that afternoon when we came home I went to the bathroom to find myself loosing my mucus plug (wish we could find a better name for that) :-) It was nice to know that I was probably making some progress, so I gave my midwife a heads-up that something just might be happening. Later that night around 10:30pm or so, my contractions became much stronger, though nothing that I couldn't talk through and there was no pattern to them . I went to bed, but couldn't sleep because of the contractions so I drank a half glass of wine hoping it would make them go away so I could sleep. It didn't. After about 2 hours of increasingly harder contractions that were very irregular I had 2 contractions with the urge to push. I woke Pete up, and Pete called Brynne, one of our midwives. She came over at 1am and found me to be 8cm dilated! I was shocked because I really wasn't even in active labor at this point.

After taking some homeopathic remedies to hopefully pick up the tempo of labor, my contractions definitely became more strong and closer together and I started to really wish we had somehow filled the birth tub up with water, even though earlier on I had told Pete to not worry about it. Now, this is where some of the story becomes a blur. I remember it being dark and quiet. I remember it being so peaceful around me as I labored (even though I was not acting very peaceful!!). I remember kind words of encouragement spoken to me from Pete, Brynne and Deren. There was a respect for birth and the way it happens naturally without interference...that respect permeated the room as I labored in those wee hours of morning.

As labor became more intense, I realized that the contractions were feeling very different than my previous births, I was feeling an intense pain in the front of my abdomen that didn't let up in between contractions. I found out I had a cervical lip. The pain really surprised me...I didn't expect to feel pain like that in between contractions and it felt nothing like a contraction. Contractions were like waves that I could "ride"...but this felt more like a sharp shooting pain that was really difficult to breathe through or find a position that alleviated what I felt. After maybe an hour or so trying to "deal" with this, I realized the only way out of this situation was to have the baby! Brynne told me she could move the rest of cervix out of the way, and we tried once but it was too painful. Then a couple contractions or so later I told Brynne to do what she needed to do so I could push this baby out! She pushed back the rest of the cervix and I finally had the urge to push.

For some reason, pushing caught me by surprise...I felt like it didn't matter what I had read about pushing or the fact that I had pushed 2 babies out already, the intensity of it all overtook me and "pushed" me to the point of complete surrender. I really wasn't "doing" anything, my body was doing the pushing and I knew that I had to get out of the way. I lost all control. (And that's what birth is about isn't it...surrendering and loosing control and just letting it happen). After pushing on my hands and knees some and then flipping over to my side, Zach made his way into the world! I remember after his head came out how BIG his shoulders felt. Brynne said it was because of the way he was holding his shoulders. After his shoulders came out, the rest of him came and Brynne put him on my belly. He was so cute...he was ours :-) Avery had a short cord when she was born, so when I tried to lift her up to see her face, it hurt. So, even though both midwives told me that his cord was long and I could hold him, for some reason I wouldn't reach down and pick him up. That was kind of a funny moment.. I don't know why I wouldn't pick him up...but after his cord was cut, then I picked him up and held him :-) He was so sweet and didn't cry at all. He just looked all around and went right to nursing. He was 8lbs 7oz and 21.5 inches long. Our biggest and longest baby ever. He was born at 6:04am after a 5 hour labor. The girls woke up in their room while I was pushing. Pete told them to stay put and that mommy was having the baby! They were so good and stayed in their room until right after he was born. The girls woke up to their new baby brother!

I cannot be more thankful for our wonderful midwives and for Pete's support. Everyone was so incredible. The girls are in love with their little brother and we are in love with our new son! So far, he's the easiest baby we've had, he rarely cries and sleeps well for us at night. He was born on June 12th, the same day 4 years ago that Pete's mom passed away. He has really lived up to his name so far in more ways than one..."The Lord has remembered".

Getting ready for the baby...

Time is flying by for our family and this little boy is going to be here before we even blink an eye. It's kind of interesting with having #3 on the way, I realize the "baby" things that we don't need and then I realize so much of what we really do need. We got rid of so much stuff between Avery and this baby, because to be quite honest, for a long time we thought we were "finished" having children. We got rid of the car seat, the crib, the swing (which we never really used anyway), bottles (which also never got used much since the girls never took a bottle of breastmilk until they were well over 10 or 11 months old!), the high chair, and a lot of baby toys. Our stroller is broken in some places and probably won't hold up for this 3rd baby.

So now, we find ourselves needing "big" things this time around, but then there is so much we do have...like baby boy clothes thanks to my sister, a dresser, lots of blankets, a bouncy seat, and some of the cloth diapers (though I think we might need a few more...we're not going to be putting this little boy in pink diapers like Avery wore!).

We've had some friends and family members asking us what we really need, so I finally got my act together and created a registry on Amazon.com, trying to keep it to things that we really need. And, okay, so there might be a few things that would be nice to have but we truely don't need them :-) ...like baby bedding :-)

Oh, and we are almost decided on a name, though it's not definite. We think we're going to name this little guy Zachary Christopher Davis and we'll call him Zach. Zachary means "the Lord has remembered". We love that...in so many different ways, that meaning speaks volumes to our lives and where we have been as a couple and as a family.

Thinking about names...

We found out we're adding a little boy to our family! We're so excited and the girls are really thrilled at the thought of having a little brother.

Names have been on my mind a lot...I have always had a really hard time coming up with boy names that I just LOVE. I have a long list of girl names that I'm in love with, but boy names just simply come harder to me. Pete and I are having fun thinking of names, letting the name "rest" on our minds a little, testing the name...just seeing if it "fits" our family. Here are some of our favorites so far (okay...and some of MY favorites):

Brayden
Harper
Cameron
Brennan
Dawson
Ezra (a favorite of mine)
Levi (a favorite of Pete)
Noah (a favorite of mine)
Austin (a favorite of Pete)

....And who knows what name will be next to pop up on the list!! What about you? Any favorite boy names that you would like to share with us (as long as you don't mind the thought of us using it? )

So thankful for Kyla

This past weekend is one of those weekend that I would rather not remember. It was definitely one of those weekends that makes you look at your precious children and thank God for their smiles, laughter, silliness, and yes...even their strong wills and arguing. Kyla is the type of kid that never seems to stop moving or talking. She talks almost non-stop all day long and tries to do handstands and gymnastics around the house most of the day.

Well, on Thursday night she woke up in the middle of the night and threw up several times. On Friday morning, simply because it was Friday, and I didn't want her to not be able to see a doctor over the weekend, I took her in to be seen. They ran a strep test and the doctor told us it was just a stomach virus. She threw up for another 48 hours, so on Sunday I called the doctor on call who told us we might want to pay a visit to the ER. Kyla was getting weaker, had not eaten in over 48 hours, and even worse, had not been able to keep down very many liquids in that amount of time. She stopped bouncing around and talking much and just wanted to lay on the couch. Sunday evening, Pete had to carry her to the ER...she couldn't walk. The doctor told us she was not dehydrated, but the doctor also didn't run any tests on her to make her statement official. No urine or blood tests were done to test for dehydration. She gave kyla a popsicle, (which she did not want to eat) and sent us on our way.

Sunday night was Kyla's 4th night of throwing up. She threw up about 5 times that night. The next morning I took one look at her and new something was seriously wrong. She was so pale, so thin...I could see almost all of her little bones. She couldn't hold her head up and wouldn't talk to us. We had to carry her everywhere. I managed to get her to eat 1 pedialyte popsicle and then eat 2 pinches of a banana which she (thankfully) kept down. We went at 10am monday morning to her doctor's office.

The doctor and nurses were surprised by our ER visit and lack of attention Kyla received there. Her doctor ran blood and urine tests that showed she was severely dehydrated. They gave her 1 liter of IV fluids, which she screamed on Peter for 1.5 hours through the 3 hour process. Then she fell into a nice deep sleep while the IV finished. I entertained Avery in the waiting room for those several hours because poor Avery was upset from hearing Kyla scream like that. The doctor told us she needed more fluids (probably another half liter) because she did not really perk up that much after the 1 liter that she received and it took her 1 full liter of fluids before she even needed to pee.

At 2:00pm after the IV was finished, the doctor told us that he wanted to admit her to the hospital, but if we were able to have her drink about a half liter of fluids before 8pm then she could stay home as long as she didn't vomit anymore. He prescribed Zofran to settle her stomach too.

We took her home, she drank and drank whatever we forced upon her...and it really did seem like forcing! She also ate 4 saltine crackers that day and little bits of banana here and there and I gave here several teaspoons of honey to keep her blood sugar up. She didn't throw up anymore on her own, and we gave her Zofran that night just in case. She woke up the next morning walking out of the bedroom with a smile on her face saying, "Mama, I feel better" and gave me a huge hug. It was so great to see her smiling and walking and talking again!

It's Thursday now, 1 week from when this all started. Kyla is back to herself eating pretty much anything. I'm having fun giving her foods to fatten her up again, as she is still really skinny. She lost almost 4lbs in 4 days. And, if you know Kyla, she doesn't really have much weight to loose!

She was trying to argue with me today about not wanting to clean up toys because she was still playing and I was honestly thankful that she was feeling good enough to try and argue :-) Today is also the first day that she had a bit of bounce back in her step and talked a lot most of the day. Sometimes, the non-stop talking gets a little tiring for me...but today I was simply thankful for who Kyla is: my sweet, and very bubbly almost 6 year old!

I was thinking through all of this how so many children in so many countries suffer from dehydration on a daily basis and how life-threatening it really is. I saw a little of this while I was in the Philippines last summer. I am so incredibly grateful that our children are healthy on a normal basis. I'm also so thankful that God healed Kyla before she had to go to the hospital!

In the pictures above, the first two are of Kyla celebrating her birthday a month early with her friends in Charlotte, NC. The last 2 pictures are about 2 days after Kyla started feeling better from her illness. In between the time...Kyla got a haircut too!

An update on life...

I've been rather absent in the blogging world lately.

Shooting weddings with Pete, teaching childbirth classes, prenatal visits with doula clients, to and from the allergist and acupuncturists for Avery's allergies, finding out she's allergic to more and more foods and things outside, Pete getting a job interview and offer in Charlottesville, Virginia and accepting!...getting ready for a possible move...and sometimes wondering why a job near the ocean has not opened up for him (avery's doctor told us to move near the ocean)...but still we're trusting that the Lord knows best where we are supposed to be right now.

....Also wondering why the Philippines had to be put on hold due to finances, but also trusting that even though He may be calling us there, it must not be His timing to GO right now....

...all that and still trying to maintain normalicy and a rhythm of some sort to our days here...

well, those are all great stories to blog about, but it's also why I haven't been blogging...
even as I write I really need to be planning for my class I'm teaching tomorrow...so, with that said...
goodnight!

SNAPSHOTS OF MOMENTS: by Pete

Despite a really rough week dealing with Avery's 2 year old attitude plus eczema, I love to look back at the moments and snapshots of good times. Pete and I love to capture the everyday moments. It rained a lot this week, and so Pete used the umbrella as the "backdrop" for the picture. You can get some pretty amazing pictures posing your kid holding a black umbrella! I love my husband's work and his talent. He is such an amazing photographer and he has taught me so much. I love being his assistant at weddings and portrait shoots. He's so much fun to work with and has such a great eye.
I would say about 70% of the pictures that I post on this blog I take throughout the days while Pete's working. But today, Pete gets all the credit for capturing some great expressions on the girls and great angles :-)

Okay, I'll stop bragging about my amazing husband.
Instead, I'll let his website (if you haven't seen it yet) show you even more of his talent.

I think we're gonna love this.

Watercoloring.
Drawing at art gallaries.
Family art night.
Homeschooling and art.
Watching her draw and color with such spontenaity and focus.
...seeing her dream and grow.
Watching Avery copy every move she makes,
and seeing her smile all day long.
(well, I would at least LOVE to see her smile all day long :-) )

I love Fridays because we just stay home and do art most of the day and play.
Watercoloring. Knitting. Sewing. Drawing. Coloring.
No errands, no appointments.
This weekend Papa came to town and we visited the NoDa art district in Charlotte.
Kyla brought her drawing book with her and sat down in front of a picture and copied it...Kyla style.
:-)

Moments: Ice Cream & Silk

Not many words today, just pictures. We had a very warm week with temperatures in the 80's and took advantage of every minute being outside. Ice cream (thanks, Baslers, for treating Kyla!), play silks, and a little wind simply made their day today...and made our day too!

Today it's rainy and chilly again, so the girls are enjoying playing with dolls and reading books. Kyla took the rainbow play silk above that you see her and Avery playing with and made a tent in the house...the girls camped out in the tent with their dolls all afternoon.

I love these times; watching their little minds be fully present and alive with creativity in each and every moment. They are not thinking about the future or the past, but fully immersed in the here and now.

Jim Elliot once said, "Wherever you are- be all there."

My children teach me each day this simple, and yet somehow difficult-to-practice art of being fully present in each moment. After all, isn't that what life is? A life made up of moments. I would love to know how you try to treasure your moments...I love reading comments!

Happy Birthday, Kyla!

Our baby girl, Kyla, is 5 years old today! She is such a blessing in so many ways to our family. She has a tender heart, a concern for the poor (often pretending her toys are children in Africa and then giving them food), she LOVES her sister, her friends Josh and Ella, preschool, pink, dress-up, and any food that is sweet. She told me the thing she was most thankful for on her birthday was her carrot cake cupcakes!

Here's a trip down memory lane of the past 5 years with our Kyla Rose! Enjoy!

Scones & Settlers

Two weekends ago we were blessed with a weekend visit by my sister Rosie and her wonderful family. Kyla and Avery loved playing with their cousin, Ian. Rosie and I enjoyed a quick sister get-a-way to our favorite store, Anthropologie, so we could drool at all the clothes and home goods....(um, it's my favorite store, I think it's Rosie's too) This time we looked at all of their yumminess in a new light, thinking of what we could go home and re-create on our sewing machines! (Of course, as always, I walked away with zero purchases. As much as it's my favorite store, it's just not affordable. Hmmm...maybe I need to find a new favorite?
No, I think not.)

Pete and Jonathan enjoyed a quick morning out for coffee while Rosie and I took the kids to the neighborhood park.

And, both evenings after the kids were all tucked in their beds, we sat down on the floor and indulged ourselves in hot tea, homemade scones, and a game of Settlers (thanks, Patrick and Megan, for getting us addicted to this game!) No matter how crazy busy we got running around after the tots, each evening the scones and Settlers were a big hit and a great way to unwind.

A beautiful mess

My sister, Rosie, and her husband and baby are coming to Charlotte to visit us for the weekend. I realized how there was absolutely nothing to eat, so off to Trader Joe's I went with the girls in toe this morning.

When I arrived home from all of our errand-running, all I saw was a mess. The dishwasher needed unstacking, the counters were full of breakfast cereal dishes, and I could hardly see the counter tops. With each step I took, I could feel crumbs beneath my feet, reminding me that our floors needed some desperate attention. But, it all had to wait, of course: the girls were hungry, mommy was hungry, and there was a beautiful day outside beckoning us to come and play.

While making lunches, I saw this beautiful little "mess" which was surrounded by other papers and dishes. I looked at it, and it made me smile.

Some new fabric and ribbon just came in the mail, and on top of it lay a little infant hat in-the-making (my very first knitting project, thanks to Amanda Soule). Kyla chose some pink tulips at Trader Joe's, and the sight of them made me happy all day long--I'm really looking forward to spring, but trying to still savor the winter.

This was my oasis for the day in the midst of household clutter :-)

Oh, and the house did get cleaned after lunches, after playing, and during naps. Having fresh flowers always give me an inspiration to clean, to make everything look fresher and newer, just like spring.

A little hockey in the street

There was suprise snow yesterday, and we woke up to streets sheets of ice. Pete and Kyla joined the Baslers in the back alley for a little ice hockey in the street and the girls were amazed at the ice...and fell more than once! Then our neighbors Chad and Laura payed us a short visit with their ever-growing bundle of joy, Sydney. Sydney was born very early because of a serious emergency and she is thriving and doing well- just look at how cute she is! (I just want to eat her up!) I had just gone through my doula training before Laura had Sydney and was able to help her some with nursing a preemie, because nursing for Laura was way more challenging than for most moms. It's so wonderful to see both mommy and baby doing so great now! God is so good :-)

ps. I want to learn to knit that adorable, hand-made purple hat she is wearing in the picture. :-) Next project, maybe?

Does It Get Any Better Than This?

I <3 Weekends

I love weekends. I really cannot say or write that enough. I love spending time with Pete, having more adult conversations throughout the day, and being together, the 4 of us, all day long. The girls are always seem to have happier attitudes when Pete is at home...they just love their daddy. I love how the weekends narrow the parent/child ratio down to something more managable!! (Am I allowed to say that even if I only have 2 children?)


So, on Friday night I decided that I wanted to learn how to knit. Well, actually, I've been wanting to learn for quite some time...years. But, finally the desire to knit drove me to figuring it out for myself by watching a few tutorials on www.youtube.com. After pausing/playing, pausing again, and playing, I think I might have figured the basics out! yeaaaa! As much as I want to knit a warm hat, Pete encouraged me to start off with a scarf. He's a smart guy and knows if what I make turns out bad, I just might think about quitting. So, a scarf it is :-) If you don't see me wearing it, you'll know why. Depending on the outcome, you may see it on one of Kyla's dolls instead. Nevertheless, I love knitting. It's becoming relaxing, almost meditative in a sense. Kyla told me today, "Sit down, mommy, and knit." So I did. I thought she wanted to see how I did it. So I started saying this little nursery rhyme that's supposed to explain the steps in knitting. She said, "Don't talk, mommy. Just knit."

??

Maybe I'm more peaceful when I knit or something.
Hey, a peaceful mommy is a pretty good thing. :-)

Ahhh...sunshine

The sun decided to come out today to play
and brought with it some warmth
to brighten up our day...


...doll babies...

jump rope...

and sidewalk chalk!

Kyla and Avery loved their few minutes in the sun,
until it was time for naps :-)

SouleMama

I don't even know her personally, but I love this mama's blog. I found it after reading one of her books, The Creative Family (in hopes for our family to do more "creative" things together :-) )

Her writing is so sweet and personable. Sometimes I even feel my heart slowing down a bit as I read. All the art projects she does with her little ones is very inspiring, yet it doesn't make me look at it and feel like "less" of a mother. I gather that she is rather down-to-earth.

Christmas Bears

In downtown Charlotte last year we took the girls to see this life-size orchestra of bears, playing Christmas songs and singing. We took them again this year and the girls absolutely loved it. They both wanted to wear their tutus and they put their tutus to good use as they danced and did ballet to the music while the bears sang. It was adorable!

Visit to Virginia

We visited our families in Virginia BEFORE Christmas this year, since I am on call right now for a birth with a mama due on Jan. 7th. The girls had a great time going to look at the lights in downtown Richmond and getting some time with their aunts, uncles, and grandparents.

Pete and I enjoyed a nice afternoon to ourselves on day and we both went to get our haircut at a nice salon in Carytown that my sister (and fashion consultant) recommended to us :-) Our new "dos" and afternoon out was a nice Christmas present from mom and dad, thanks!

A spring december day

Our girls are just not getting outside enough for free play and time to explore nature. It's really hard to want to bundle two kiddos up when it's very cold outside only have them tell you after 5 minutes that they want to go back inside! I'm such a wimp when it comes to the cold and lately the mornings have been in the lower 30's and the afternoons haven't been much more than 40 degrees....if that.

Yesterday and today we were blessed with some very warm weather for December. Today was kind of rainy and overcast, but it got up to 70 degrees. After the girls woke up from their naps we went down to a little creek in our neighborhood which is behind the playground. There were lots of rocks, sticks, leaves, dirt and mud. The girls had a blast!

The sticks became fishing poles, the leaves became fish swimming in the water, and the big rocks became their house. Avery giggled with delight as she sunk her foot in the mud and then watched it come out all sticky. Kyla spent most of her time gathering different sticks and using them to catch "fish".

I think it's their new favorite place to go...they had so much fun!

Creating an Advent Tradition

Last night Pete and I were talking about what we want our children to remember about Christmas. So, beginning one week late we are going to start celebrating the season of Advent by lighting candles representing hope, peace, joy, love and then finally the Christ candle on Christmas.
On another blog I even read how there are even Advent spirals that you walk around which represents the journey Mary took as she carried baby Jesus inside her womb. Children walk around holding candles and when they get to the center of the spiral, they place their candles on a piece of wood. I thought that sounded so meaningful and something that would definitely leave lasting impression in a child's mind.
The last thing we want is our children to think Christmas is about getting toys. I will be the first to admit it is fun to buy the girls toys. A few good quality toys that spark the imagination can become heirlooms handed down the generations. Handmade toys are great or toys that are made from workers who get paid a fair wage. What saddens my heart about the season is the commercialism. I will never understand how people wait in long lines to save money on gifts on black friday. It is so sad to read the story of the Walmart employee that was trampled to death in Manhattan. And, then another story of someone who was killed at Toys R us on black friday. Someone's life was taken away and all because of a bunch of people wanting to be first and hurrying to buy the latest plasma-screen TV or iPod.
Could you even imagine if everyone just slowed down and spent more time with their family baking Christmas cookies as their gifts for friends and neighbors? What if everyone turned off the television so all of the ads for toys and various gadgets were not being thrown in their faces?

In the mornings we get our little nativity set down and I tell the girls the Christmas story as best as I can so they will understand. I asked Kyla why do we give a gift at Christmas time? And she said "because the wise men brought gifts to Jesus when He was a born baby."

So, that's what it's about.

May you enjoy your family traditions this Christmas, and enjoy creating new ones!